


Take Me to Church

by NerdAlert (alltimelisa)



Series: Stilinski-Hale Family Affair [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:35:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24920920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alltimelisa/pseuds/NerdAlert
Summary: Parents! Stiles and Derek take their adorable twins to a baby play time class and meet some interesting people.
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski
Series: Stilinski-Hale Family Affair [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1852597
Comments: 6
Kudos: 126





	Take Me to Church

**Author's Note:**

> This is very short, not edited, and written in a day. I may add small vignettes to it but we shall see. I have another fic I should be writing for so I probably will add more to this as I procrastinate lmao. Let me know what you think and thanks for reading.

Antoinette watched as the two men struggled their way through the door, one tripping so hard she feared he would fall over on top of the baby strapped to his chest but at the last moment the other man grabbed his elbow stopping his forward momentum. The slightly taller man frowns at the shorter one and they seem to be having a whispered argument and she can only pick out bits and pieces. 

“- Told you you should’ve just brought the car seat-“ 

“-he likes being held!” 

“All babies like to be held-“ 

“I know that! But our baby is special, he told me so,” 

The man with the black hair and glasses rolls his eyes at this moment and Antoinette gets the feeling that this is an old argument between the two. 

“Oh so he _told_ _you-“_

_ “Yes Derek,  _ he told me,” the brown haired man in a plaid shirt says before turning towards Antoinette with a huge grin. 

“Hi! We’re here for the babies class!” 

Antoinette blinks at him, clearly the two were just arguing but she merely nods and asks for their names. Michael was in for an interesting class with this set of parents. 

Once the two are checked in they head into the room and their whispered argument resumes when they think they are out of ear shot. For a rare moment Antoinette wishes she could sit in and watch the class. Instead she pasted on a smile and greets the next couple walking in. 

* * *

Stiles pulls their son out of the baby carrier and sits on a red foam square before placing the baby in his lap. Beaming at Derek he pats the blue square next to him and makes an outrageous ‘come hither’ look, including the decidedly unsexy wriggling eyebrows. Derek rolls his eyes but after carefully removing their daughter from the car seat he was carrying and joins Stiles sitting crisscross on a foam square. 

The room is full of young well to do parents, many of whom are dressed like Stiles in plaid shirts and graphic tees paired with frayed jeans and worn down converse. Derek is surprised that Lydia would recommend his place to them when Stiles leans over and whispers about the founder of some huge app sitting across from them. The man is sporting a mustache that would be more fitting on an 80’s cartoon villain but that seems to be the style, Derek laments silently. 

There are a few toys scattered about, and Derek notices a few sensory balls near their foam mats. He knows Stiles must have scoped out the area and chosen what had the best toys before choosing their spot. Their seats are also coincidentally within clear view of the door, and shoots Stiles a quick smile in thanks and doesn’t say that the crinkle blanket may have been a better play choice. Before he can take in anymore details a young man with dark skin claps and takes a seat on the last foam square available, a jazzy orange one with a picture of a cow that admittedly looks cooler than Derek's plain blue square with a green capital letter A. 

“Welcome everyone! My name is Michael and I will be leading this class today,” he scoops up a baby that had been crawling in the middle of the circle and bounces her in front of his crossed legs. “This here is Amaya and she will be my assistant today,” he finishes with a charming grin. If Stiles weren’t married he would happily hop on that.

Amaya is the cutest baby in the world, besides his kids of course. She has smooth brown skin, chubby cheeks with deep dimples and a happy toothless smile. Her curly hair is pulled into two cute pink curly puffs on the side of her head, which matches her pink onesie and pants perfectly. Derek can’t help but smile and bounce Mia in front of him. Stiles has cupped Myles under his bottom with one hand and the other is holding his chest and they sway gently. Derek would never admit it but Myles does seem best when he is being held safely in someone's arms. 

Mia is dressed in a green onesie that declares her a ‘cute-ness monster’ paired with gray leggings covered in different kinds of construction vehicles. It is what many would consider a  _ boys _ outfit but one thing he and Stiles agreed on was that their children would not be forced into anything, not even gender stereotypes. Myles is in a yellow sleeveless onesie with a rainbow and felt clouds that exclaims ‘Hello Sunshine!’ paired with gray bottoms. Derek always insists the twins don’t have to match, knowing how much his cousins hated being forced to dress alike but Stiles was always able to sneak something by him. 

“Now in this class we really want the child to know that it is okay to explore, and that they are in a safe space. This is something that is often harder for the parent to grasp,” Michael says with a lighthearted chuckle. 

“I want you to start by laying your child down on their back, facing you. Pick up a toy of your choice and begin to interact with them. One thing that is important, is to always talk to your baby! This is necessary for brain growth and development, they may not seem like they know much but they are taking everything in. As a matter of fact I can see many babies looking around the room already!” Micheal talks as the parents begin to follow his instructions and lay their babies down. Once Myles is laid flat his face screws up as he realizes he isn’t being held anymore. Stiles coos and tickles to no avail, Myles lets out his first cry and all eyes in the room shoot to the pair. 

“Don’t be alarmed if your baby is upset at first, your arms are the safest place they can be and they know it! Try distracting them with a toy and don’t let them sense your fear, children are kinda like sharks in that sense,” Michael says as he tickles Amayas tummy and grins when she lets out a loud squealing laugh. Derek pretends he doesn’t hear Stiles mutter “easy for you to say with the world's most perfect assistant.”

Michael continues to call out assurances across the room, ignoring Myles' cries. Mia has latched onto a cloth cube that has different textures and noises on each side. She is currently trying to pull the mirrored side close enough to her face to chew on but Derek maintains his grip and continues to shake it. 

“Do you want to switch,” he hisses over to Stiles, not sure why he's whispering in a room full of loud babies. 

“Nah, I know why he’s upset but we have to at least try to get him acclimated.”

“Should we at least switch toys, this one seems to be working for Mia,” Stiles huffs but nods quickly, Myles screams seeming to reach a fever pitch. They quickly swap out toys and Mia promptly tries to shove a spiked rubber ball that is as big as her head into her mouth. Derek narrowly manages to snag the ball before one of the soft spikes pokes her in her eye, still she glares at him for the injustice. 

Derek rolls his eyes and murmurs a quick apology, figures his daughter would inherit his expressive brows. Though they never checked everyone thinks Mia is his daughter and Myles is Stiles son. He is bouncing the ball on Mia's tummy and leaning over to make silly faces when Michael wanders over holding Amaya, who looks confused at the noise coming out of Myles. 

“Some babies need the sensation of being held to feel safe, try rolling this across this tummy and see if it helps,” he says tossing Stiles a smooth ball that has changing colored lights inside of it. Stiles shrugs and shakes the toy above Myles face. The boy stops mid cry and his eyes track the lights inside the ball. His face pulls into a frown as he contemplates whether this toy is interesting enough to solve his papa’s betrayal. Stiles rolls the toy from his legs to his tummy before shaking the ball again. Myles lets out a fart and Stiles takes it as permission to continue. 

Michael laughs and congratulates the pair before moving on, not a moment too soon as Derek fights not to retch at the truly awful smell that Myles released. After a few minutes of minor chats with each parent Michael goes back to his seat and calls the class to attention. 

“Now that we have gotten our kids a little more comfortable we are going to move onto the second portion of class. This is what most parents find hardest to do, and I’ve found it goes much more smoothly when everyone takes the time to introduce themselves and their child. Alright, lets get started with you over here,” Michael says pointing to a pretty brown haired woman to his right. She has electric green eyes that pop in her California tanned skin. She looks like a surfer and her baby is just as cute, a browned eyed boy with blonde hair and freckled skin. 

“Hi everyone, my name is Kerry, and this little guy here is Isaac! We are originally from Santa Barbara but moved here about a year ago for work. Isaac is 9 months old as of last week and we’re excited to be here.” 

Next is an Asian couple, the man dressed in sensible slacks with a green polo tucked in. It matches his wife's outfit of a forest green maxi dress that she has managed to drape around her to look like a queen, despite sitting on the floor of a children's play room. 

“I am Robert and this is my wife Jia and our daughter Mei. We work in the area and were hoping to help Mei get acquainted with other babies as she is an only child,” Robert says smiling at his adorable daughter. She almost gives Amaya a run for her money in the cute department. She is in a pastel blue jumper with hearts all over it, and a matching pink shirt underneath. Her hair is pulled into a ponytail at the top of her head and it points straight up. It is quite possibly the cutest thing they have seen all day. 

Michael continues around the circle, hearing from every parent, Derek quickly zones out, knowing Stiles will keep track of every parent and child for him. Soon enough Stiles nudges him and Derek looks up at Michael who is staring expectantly at him. He furrows his brows and pushes his glasses up on the bridge of his nose before he speaks. 

“I’m Derek, and this is Mia,” he states before looking at Stiles to continue. 

“Please forgive my husband,” Stiles says rolling his eyes self deprecatingly. They both know it's his job to talk to people and it’s for this exact reason. “As he was saying he’s Derek, and with him is our precocious little princess Mia. Derek works as an art therapist for the local college. I am Stiles, yes it is a nickname, and this here is the magnificently cool Myles! Him and Mia are twins, and as much as I would love to be a stay at home dad for these two my husband won’t let me. Instead I work in the mythology and folklore department at the college,” Stiles finishes with a beaming smile. The other parents looks slightly confused at his rambling, but Michael moves them along to the next parent and child and soon they are forgotten. 

“Alright, now that we’re done with introductions it is time to let your babies explore! Whether they want to crawl, put strange toys in their mouths, or if you wanna walk them around the room, just be sure to let them lead if you do choose that last option,” Michael says after the last man finishes his introductions. Derek and Stiles immediately stand up and place their babies feet on the ground, holding their hands as they hunch over slightly in order to keep the babies feet on the ground. Mia squalls in delight while Myles screws up his face in what could either be a smile or a grimace of annoyance. The optimist in Derek likes to think it’s a smile. Myles leads Stiles towards a bouncing swing and Derek loses sight of them as Mia tugs him on unsteady feet in the opposite direction. 

Mia leads Derek over to a rocking horse and yells some gibberish at Derek. Instead of a saddle it has a seat for children to stick their legs through, clearly designed for smaller babies.

“Oh what a smart girl! You want to ride the horsie, very good,” Derek praises as he gently lifts her up and into the horse. Cora had read an article about how girls were praised more for being pretty rather than being smart and the entire pack had taken to reminding Mia how smart she was as often as possible. 

Mia is currently alternating between squealing in delight and yelling at Derek, who answers her dutifully and seriously. It’s as he is explaining why they cannot possibly fit a real horse in their backyard that one of the other parents walks up with their kid. It was a slender woman who has caked on far too much makeup just for a baby playtime hour, he thinks her name is Anna. 

“Hi, so sorry to interrupt, but Bryce here is in charge for now,” the woman laughs, knocking Derek with her hip. 

“Oh no worries, if you want you can take over the rocking horse, Mia should probably go explore more of the room,” Derek says with an uncomfortable smile. Stiles always tells him his fake smiles make him look like an axe murderer, but this woman doesn’t seem to notice. 

“Oh pish posh, don't you worry about that! You were very vague on the carpet, I was hoping to get to know you a little more. You know Bryce is an only child and he needs more friends to have play dates with,” she says with an unnaturally bright smile. Derek wisely decides not to tell her how stupid a play date for babes who can’t even talk would be. 

“Yea maybe, I’m not sure what our schedule looks like but I can always ask my husband,” Derek says with a shrug as he continues to rock Mia. The little girl is frowning deeply at being ignored and is about 5 seconds from a melt down if Derek doesn’t get back to his conversation with her. 

“Well that's no worries, if anything my church has a fabulous Sunday school program! Best to get the kids into Christ early, ya know. Let me leave you their card, I would love to see you there!”

“Sorry, Sundays are family days, but thank you,” Derek says picking Mia up out of the rocking horse and cradling her to his chest. She immediately wriggles around until her ear is placed over his heart and sighs in content. 

“Well God is a part of every family! Don’t worry, they’re okay with _your_ people,” Anna says with a wink as she turns to plop her son into the horse that Mia just vacated. She places a wedged foot at the base of the horse and proceeds to rock Bryce as she turns to face Derek once more. 

“You know with a baby as fussy as your other one, church might help. He even seems delayed, have you had him checked out? My Bryce was rolling around well before this age, though not everyone can be as advanced as him. I can have the Pastor pray for Milos. I have an in,” She continues on oblivious to how Derek is struggling not to yell in her bottle blond face. 

“Thanks, but like I said, we’re busy.”

“That's fine, they also hold different events throughout the week, after class I’ll give you their card,” the woman calls to Derek's back as he walks away. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


“Swap,” Stiles says, approaching Derek and tilting Myles towards him. It was a system they developed to make sure each of them was spending equal time with each twin, though it wasn’t really necessary as the babies were passed around between pack members and their parents so often it would take months for the pack smell to leave their skin. 

“Dude, put those murder brows away before Michael says we aren't welcome back,” Stiles mutters elbowing Derek as he takes Mia from his hands. Derek quickly whispers the story to Stiles who turns bright red in anger. The young man had always been quick to defend his loved ones, it was only exacerbated when Erica had the twins. Derek had no clue how they were going to keep Stiles out of prison once the kids were in school and had to deal with bullies and real asshole parents. He just prayed the sheriff wouldn't retire before then. 

“I'm going to kill her! Milos?! That isn’t his name and she knows it! And they do so know how to roll over, Derek! I’ve seen it with my own two eyes,” Stiles whispers hotly pretending he doesn't notice Derek leading them away from the woman who is now chatting with some other unsuspecting parent who wandered too close. 

They move back to the foam mats and set the twins down who immediately begin crawling. Stiles is in the middle of describing her awful spray tan that is both entirely too dark and orange at the same time. 

“You guys talking about Astor,” Jia says coming to sit across from them with a sleeping Mei cradled in her arms.

“Yes, you would not believe what she said to my husband,” Stiles exclaims starting off all over again. 

“Trust me, I believe it. She spent the first five minutes yelling at us and asking how we learned to speak English ‘so good’. I was born in Los Angeles County and my husband is from Harlem,” Jia continues rolling her eyes. 

“Oh my God, I did not think I could hate her more,” Stile shrieks, causing more than a few eyes to shoot towards them. 

“We’re first time parents, we were hoping to join this group and meet a few like minded adults since we’re the only ones in our friend group with children, but if they’re all like her we may be out of luck." Stiles says in a much more normal tone

“Oh no not at all! She puts on a front about her Pastor husband but he never shows up, I think she's lonely. Everyone else puts up with her because otherwise Bryce will never make friends and it isn't fair to punish him for his awful mother.” Stiles nods and absentmindedly snags Mia by her legging as she wanders a little too far from their group. Derek has Myles sitting between his legs, the boy far more content to look at the pages of a book Derek is slowly flipping through, than crawling the floor. 

“If you let her, Jia will gossip about all of the parents here,” Robert says rolling his eyes fondly at his wife. “So how long have you two been married?”

“Two years, though I would’ve married him a long time ago if he had let me,” Derek says smiling at Stiles. Stiles leans over and pecks his cheek with a murmur of ‘Sappywolf’.

“My father would have killed him, which Derek likes to forget. We’ve known each other since I was in high school, though it was a long time before we got together. How did you two meet?”

“This one here spilled coffee down my blouse as I was rushing to an interview. Turns out the interview was to be his assistant and he hired me out of guilt.” Jia says giggling. 

“That is blatantly false, she was late and ran into  _ me _ and somehow I get blamed for her ruined shirt. She never did buy me another coffee either,” Robert says with a mock glare. 

“I gave you a baby, that beats out a million coffees.”

The two couples continue talking until Michael draws the class back to attention. He thanks everyone for joining and invites them to sign up for next weeks class. Jia and Robert invite them out for coffee but Stiles and Derek decline claiming a family event after and reschedule for next week instead. 

* * *

“So, what are your thoughts Sourwolf,” Stiles says dragging out the ‘o’ obnoxiously as he buckles Myles into his car seat. 

“Overall not bad, I don’t see why we need to pay such crazy prices when we can literally do the same thing at home,” Derek shrugs as he checks to make sure Mia’s seat is properly secured. 

“Duh we can do it all at home, but if it were up to you we’d never leave the pack house,” Stiles says shooting a fond grin at Derek. They both know he’s right so Derek changes the subject. 

“How did you feel about Jia and Robert?”

“They were great and we are definitely going to take them up on their offer for coffee next week, or maybe we can do a nice picnic in the park,” the pair continue their chatter until they arrive at the pack house. Stiles has just finished unbuckling Mia from her seat when Erica swoops in and plucks her from his hands. 

“Here’s my beautiful girl, did you miss your Auntie Erica,” she coos to an uninterested Mia. Derek unbuckles a sleeping Myles and hands him off to Lydia who has her eyebrow arched expectantly. 

“You guys do know that these are  _ our _ kids, right?” Derek sighs, not even bothering to complain knowing they will all ignore him anyway. 

“Hey, how was Tummy Time,” Scott asks as he eats directly from a pint of chocolate ice cream. His arm is moving so fast as he shovels the frozen treat Derek is in awe that he hasn’t gotten a brain freeze. 

“Oh you would not  _ believe _ what this woman said about Myles,” Stiles begins, launching into his tirade all over again. Based on the way Erica's eyes are glowing as she gently rocks Mia Derek knows she’s going to find a way to ‘bump’ into them as they exit the class next week. 

Derek sits down on the couch and pulls Stiles onto his lap. He nuzzles into his neck and lets the scent soothe him as he tunes out the conversations around him. He is surrounded by pack and that is all that matters. They can worry about Ashleigh another day. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Derek consistently gets the woman's name wrong because she's awful and not worth remembering. If you saw any errors let me know and thanks again for reading!


End file.
